Last Wishes Letter Template: What a Letter of Wishes Is, What to Put in It, and How It Differs From a Will

October 18, 2026 · 8 min read

A will is a legal instrument. It says who gets the house, who is the executor, who looks after the children. It is formal, witnessed, and after you die it becomes a public document. What it is bad at is everything else: that your daughter should have the blue vase because she was the one who always noticed it, that you would like the Fauré Requiem and absolutely not a slideshow, that the reason your brother is not in the will is that you already paid off his mortgage in 2019 and you do not want anyone to think it was a snub.

That is what a last wishes letter is for. Solicitors call it a letter of wishes; families call it the letter in the envelope. This guide gives you a last wishes letter template you can write in an evening, explains what it can and cannot do, and covers the two mistakes that make most of these letters useless: contradicting the will, and nobody knowing the letter exists.

What a letter of wishes is, and is not

A letter of wishes is a private, informal document that accompanies your will. It is addressed to the people who will have to act after your death, usually your executors, the trustees of any trust and the guardians of your children, and it tells them what you would like and why. It is not legally binding. Your executors have to consider it, and most will follow it closely, but they can depart from it if circumstances have changed. That is a feature. A letter can be updated by you at your kitchen table without a solicitor or witnesses, precisely because it carries no legal weight.

Three consequences follow. First, anything that must happen, such as who inherits the flat, belongs in the will, not the letter. Second, the letter stays confidential after your death; unlike a will it does not go on the public record, although executors may show it to a disappointed relative if they think it will head off a dispute. Third, the letter must never contradict the will. If the will leaves the jewellery to your son and the letter says your niece should have the ring, you have created exactly the argument you were trying to prevent.

Last wishes letter template: section by section

You do not need legal language. Write in your own voice, in the first person, and date it. The sections below are the ones solicitors most often recommend; skip any that do not apply and add any that do.

1. Who this is for and where the will is

Open with one line: "This letter is for my executors, [names], and should be read alongside my will dated [date], which is held at [solicitor / safe / location]." Executors will be reading this on a bad day; tell them immediately what it is and that the will takes precedence.

2. Funeral and memorial wishes

Burial or cremation; religious, humanist or none; the music, readings and people you would like involved; what should happen to ashes; whether you want flowers or donations to a named charity; anything you emphatically do not want. If you have already written a separate funeral wishes document, refer to it here rather than copying it, so there is only one version to keep current.

3. Personal possessions and who should have them

This is the section families value most and wills handle worst. List the items that carry meaning rather than money and say who should have each one and, briefly, why: "The walnut writing desk to Priya, who did her homework at it for ten years." The why is not sentiment for its own sake. It is what stops a sibling feeling overlooked, because they can see the reasoning rather than guessing at it.

4. Guidance for guardians

If your will names guardians for minor children, the letter is where you tell them how you hoped the children would be raised: schooling, faith or its absence, contact with particular relatives, the sports or music you would like kept up, the family traditions you want to survive you. Guardians consistently say this is the part they wish they had been given. Do the same for pets if you have arranged for someone to take them.

5. Reasons behind the will

If you have treated children unequally, left someone out, or given a large gift to a charity or a friend, say why, calmly and factually. A clear explanation in your own words, written while you were plainly of sound mind, is one of the most useful things an executor can hold if the will is challenged. Keep it kind; this letter will be read by the people it is about.

6. Practical pointers

Where the important documents are, who your accountant and solicitor are, which accounts have standing orders that will need stopping, and how to get into your digital life. Do not put passwords in the letter itself; point to a password manager with emergency access or a sealed envelope held separately, and list the accounts that matter. Our digital legacy planning checklist is a good source for this section.

7. Messages

A letter of wishes can end with a few lines to the people reading it, but it is a poor vehicle for the things you actually want to say to your children or partner, because it is addressed to executors and read in the middle of administration. Write those as separate legacy letters or as scheduled messages delivered after your death, and mention in this letter that they exist and where.

A short worked example

"To my executors, Anna and Tom. Please read this with my will dated 3 March 2026, held by Hartley & Co. I would like to be cremated, with a non-religious service and the Fauré Requiem; no slideshow, please. Ashes on the hill above Aunt Mary's house. Donations to the local hospice rather than flowers. The blue Murano vase should go to Leela; the records to Sam, who will actually play them. I have left the residue to Anna and Tom equally and nothing to my brother David, because I cleared his mortgage in 2019 and we agreed that was his share; there is no falling-out. My passwords are in my 1Password emergency kit, which Anna has. I have written each of you a letter; FinalSaying will deliver them. Thank you for doing this. 18 October 2026." Two hundred words, and every one of them saves someone an argument or a search.

What to leave out

• Anything that must be binding. Gifts of money or property, the choice of executor or guardian, and conditions on inheritances all belong in the will.
• Passwords, PINs and account numbers. The letter will be photocopied and passed around; keep secrets in a system built for them.
• Score-settling. Explanations yes, accusations no. Executors may have to show this to the person it is about.
• Instructions that contradict the will. Check the two documents side by side before you sign the letter.

Signing, storing and keeping it current

Sign and date the letter by hand. It needs no witnesses. Keep it with the will, but not stapled or clipped to it, because marks on a will can raise questions about tampering and slow probate down. Tell your executors it exists and where it is; a perfect letter nobody finds is the same as no letter. When you update it, which you should whenever the will changes or a listed possession is given away, destroy the old copy so there is only ever one.

The hardest part of a last wishes letter is not the writing. It is making sure it reaches the right people at the right time, which is exactly the gap that sending messages after death is designed to close. Store the letter with the will, and set up a message that tells your executors where to look, delivered only when you are no longer around to tell them yourself.